Sibling Rivalry

Definitions

Sibling rivalry refers to acts of jealousy, competition and fighting among brothers and sisters (siblings).

Sibling rivalry is common in families with two or more children.

child’s needs at different ages can affect how children relate to one another. For example, younger children may fight over getting their parents’ attention, while older children compete with each other to prove themselves better or stronger.

Each child is competing to define who they are as individuals.

Each child wants his parents’ attention.

Older children are often in a parenting role over younger children. This may frustrate the younger children because the older children have authority over them.

Demonstrate effective ways for siblings or family members to resolve differences.

Help parents and family members learn nonviolent approaches.

Encourage parents to model non-violent ways to resolve differences.

Promote ways that families can lessen sibling rivalry, including:

• Schedule one-on-one time with each child.
• Encourage open communication among family members.
• Participate in weekly family meetings or talking circles.
• Set and enforce limits and reasonable consequences.
• Identify opportunities to support family members in their activities.

There are non-violent ways to settle conflicts. Aggression and verbal and physical fighting between siblings is not acceptable.

Sibling rivalry is normal but it does not have to result in destructive behavior or negative feelings.

Certain triggers may spark sibling rivalry. It might be helpful for family members to track the rivalry behaviors, such as identifying what time of day or during what activities the rivalry occurs.

Children with special needs or disabilities may require more attention and time with parents.

• Other children may act out as result of feeling like they are not getting enough attention.
• This may trigger sibling rivalry.

Each child is unique and has his own personality

Referral information, including reports from medical providers, school teachers, or other sources regarding the child’s well-being.

Client history related to sensory functioning, development, and psychological history.

Treatment Plan, including a history of presenting problem and recommended course of treatment.

Releases of Information (ROI) that are current or updated. Be sure to get a signed ROI before obtaining information about the child from other sources.

Signs, Symptoms and Risk Indicators

Family-related factors Family has more than one child Parents who may have a favorite child and the other children in the family know Family uses verbal or physical aggression to settle their differences Parents don’t listen to both sides of their sons’ and daughters’ stories Parents do not enforce limits on destructive fighting Parents stress competition between siblings, instead of cooperation A child in the family has special needs, such as developmental delays, chronic illness, etc. Parents show love and affection to non-biological children within family (e.g., foster children or step-children) Children have very different personalities or temperaments

Evaluation Questions

Patterns of sibling rivalry How many people live in your home? How many brothers and sisters do you have? Are there other children living in your home? Is there a new baby or child living in your home? Do you fight with your siblings on a regular basis? What do you usually fight about? Are your fights verbal? Do you ever get into physical fights? Do you ever feel like you have to prove yourself to your family? How do your family members communicate with each other? What have you tried to keep you from fighting with your siblings? Do you have family meetings? Do you have family meals together? Do you ever have one-on-one time with your parents?

Develop a treatment plan.

• If there is a current treatment plan, refer to it first.
• Work with your clinical team to determine the most relevant and appropriate interventions to use for this child’s treatment.
• Integrate the information you gathered from the child, caregiver, and other sources.
• Request collateral information including reports or records from other sources.
• Identify ways to use the child’s personal strengths and abilities.
• Consult with your clinical supervisor.

Treatment goals

• Revisit the original referral question (i.e., Why did this child come in for services)?
• What signs, symptoms, and risk factors require immediate attention? What can be addressed over the course of treatment?
• What positive factors can be increased (such as social supports or medication management)?
• What signs, symptoms and risk factors can be decreased (such as the frequency of symptoms or sad or hopeless feelings)?

Possible interventions

Depending on the child's presenting problems and level of risk, consider the following interventions for his treatment:

• Crisis services;
• A safety plan;
• Detoxification facilities;
• Inpatient treatment;
• Residential treatment programs;
• Educational counseling;
• Community resources;
• Peer support;
• Home visits;
• Cultural Activities;
• Individual counseling;
• Family counseling; or
• Group therapy

Referrals

Consult with your clinical supervisor or treatment team when you need to refer the child.

The child may need referrals to some of the following:

• Mental health services;
• Substance abuse services, including tobacco cessation specialists;
• Primary care services (medical or dental);
• Medication review services;
• Career/educational or vocational testing;
• Psychological assessment services;
• Social support services including Infant Learning Programs or an Individualized Education Plan; or
• Legal services

Follow through and follow up

Provide the child and caregiver with:

• A copy of the treatment plan;
• Your office contact information; and
• Time and date for the child’s next appointment or follow-up contact.

Report incidences of the following, based on your organizations policies and procedures:

• Child abuse or neglect;
• Suicidal thoughts or plans; and
• Intentions to cause harm or injury to another person.
  • See Chapter B-5, Mandatory Reporting and Duty to Warn.

Summarize and document the following information according to your organizations’ policies and procedures.

Information reported by the child, caregiver, and other sources.

• What the child reported as the most important problems and concerns.
• What the caregiver reported as the most important problems and concerns.

Observations of the child, caregiver, and situation, including information from the:

• Screening (including high risk mental health conditions);
• Mental Status Exam;
• Signs, symptoms, and risk indicators;
• Child’s strengths and positive characteristics; and
• Themes related to the presenting problems.

Your clinical impression of the child’s presenting problem.

• Has the presenting problem improved or declined?
• What factors are affecting the child’s progress towards treatment goals.

Progress towards treatment goals.

• Describe any interventions used with this child and how he responded to them.
• Plan for how to address the child’s treatment goals in future sessions.
• Record upcoming appointment dates or dates for future contact.